「 what i have to say... 4:32 AM 」

yeah... today was my biathlon race day, it was real fun to do this race and it is one of my favourite cos i combines swimming and running altogether... =)

but this year was at east coast and the swimming part was a real killer... cannot see where the markings of the route was. not to mention, you get stung by something in the sea. sharp acute pain keeps on coming while you are swimming against the current. *ouch ouch*

however, the run part was still the normal ones, and it was indeed shady like the officials keep on say. i kept to my pace and completed with lots of energy to spare. this year the food and drinks that i have taken prove to be a crucial part of my race, as i have not been training too much... hees...

but i'm glad i've completed my second biathlon and hope to do more in the years to come... maybe even add a triathlon to my belt, if i managae to get a good road bicycle... any recommendations??

yeah... too tired now... need to rest... Zzz....

*will try to add photos when i can... hee....*

oh oh... almost forgot to mention that God answered my prayer today!!

after my race, just after i boarded the bus... it began to start raining... and it was quite heavy too... and as it was approaching my stop i prayed that when i reach there the rain would stop or get smaller... and it did!! Praise the Lord! hees... and i reached home dry... without getting drenched in the rain

He answers prayers...

「 what i have to say... 2:19 PM 」

what made Jesus embrace the cross?

i watched the passion of Christ today on good friday in church and that was the question that was going through my mind all the time.

the reason that He did that was because He knew what the cross meant to Him. He knew that the cross was the only way that allowed Man's redemption to God once again... He knew that the cross was the Father's plan, and that was the way that the Father had wanted Him to go through. He knew that the cross was that which He had came down to earth for, that it was only by the cross, that all that He came down for was to be accomplished.

He knew that He knew that the cross was that and more. the cross was the reason that He came and He had to embrace the cross that was the way that the Father made for Man's salvation.

He embraced it because of love. the love for all mankind. the love that He had for you and me since the day we were in our mother's womb. and it was that same love that held Him on the cross, the same love that reconciled both Man and God.

it was Love...

the truth hurts... but i would rather the truth me told to me, and let bear with it all at once, rather than to guess about it for the rest of my life, which would mean a slow dying process...

why is it not surprising that i know that i know that some people do not keep their promises? the things that they say so very much contradict that which they do... haiz... not the first time anyway that such a thing has happened... do such people love breaking their promises especially after they said it in such a convincing manner?

haiz... trust has been given and so it has been broken. and that in that shows the true colours. but watever... i will not be brought down... stay strong and stay on course...

that which has drove down the hill, i hope that you would turn back... sometimes, things are not always the best the way that you see it...

although a feel that this appiles to me to, as in the breaking of promises part, but certain promises i do keep, and i have kept them even till now.(like 2 years??) it is usually the other party that breaks it first, and in a matter of weeks too... haiz... sometimes, being too trustworthy is bad... always being bullied by people... hate it... good bye...

「 what i have to say... 9:43 AM 」

there is no such thing as perfection, because the world is imperfect. yet it is this imperfection that make the world beautiful....

「 what i have to say... 6:33 PM 」

When posed with the question that "if you could have your memories erased," would you actually say yes to it? "it would help you to be more efficient in the things that you do, because you would be without all those "excess baggage" that would actually hamper you from making the best out of who you are."

for me, although the thought of it would be tempting, but i would rather live a life of memorises than to do without them.

memories, no matter good or bad, have come to shape who you are. they are, to a certain degree, the things that make up the way that you behave towards certain matters and how you react to situations. for example, if you almost drowned when you were young, most of these people would grow up being afraid to go near swimming pools or the sea. i guess that when it comes to bad memories, the self naturally comes up with a certain self defense mechanism that reflects upon the memory itself.

of course, who does not wish to have those bad memories erased? by doing so, it would save so much trouble in having to overcome them. just at a touch of a button, they would all be gone, and the world would be so much of a better place.

this in itself speaks of a person who does not dare to face up to the problems that pop up in life. it is in overcoming these bad memories that one can be allowed to grow, allowed to be a stronger person in the end. that which does not kill you, can only make you stronger. being an overcomer rather than being overcome, is something that only with memories of past events, can such action be possible.

do not think that good memories would hence not lead to excess baggages. some people, being so caught up in the past, do not wish to move forward. these are people who keep on saying that 'it was much better in the older days' or things like ' i wish that things could be like last time'. it is time to wake up and see that things have indeed changed, it is no longer like that of the past. buildings have been demolished and new ones are come up. if one is so stuck up at, ' the past being better' the reality is that if one still stays in the past, you too will become history.

believe in creating something new today. memories are there to remind you of who you are. tap on those memories and build a better future with what you have in your hands now. of course there will be times where one hopes to go back to the past, but rememeber not too dwell too much upon it. for such memories are left in the past for a reason, so that one can go on with life and be stronger to face the greater challengers ahead.

「 what i have to say... 12:48 AM 」

when it comes to life... what is it that matters in a person? is it how they look? or is it how much money they have?

i believe that as much as the above mentioned things may be good, the most important that one should look at when being a person is character.

you may ask, why character? cos i believe that just with this point, it would very well cover all the other goood things that follow it.

character is define as who a person really is. many times in life, be it if we want to or not, we start to wear masks, masks that hide who we really are. at times, masks are worn to present a better side of ourselves to another person. but that in that, means that one is not true to oneself. but then again, who can blame you for doing that?

being one of character means a person who is not ashamed of showing who he or she really is to another person. that person is confident of who he is, not needing things or masks to define who he is deep inside.

but in doing this, there is a catch to it. in doing so, in showing people who you are, means that you are vulnarable to people. why? cos you would be sharing the true side of who you are. and at times, people may not like that way that you are, and try to at times to hurt you. and believe me, it hurts.

so why not wear a mask like everyone else? cos it's all about being who you are.
i would rather be who i really am in front of people than to live a life of forever behind a mask. things that i do not have, i do not try to act that as if i have them. if people fall in love with the mask that you wear, would they be people who still love you when that mask is taken down one day? as much as the hurts and pains that may follow, i will be who i am in front of people. the real true me. one that need not hide, one that is confident of who God made me to be.
to love me or to hate me, try as you may, i will not be brought down. love me for who i really am, and be who you really are.